Friday 21 January 2022

The Gelderland Legal Team Make Representations!

The Gelderland legal team have advanced a range of arguments for the need to consider a wider definition of the success of Hunchmausen’s campaign in Schrote!

"In respect of other Gelderland/Vulgarian achievements - there is of course the wider issue of Mittelheim's political opinion to consider. The political entity of Schrote remains in being and largely unscathed; it now has the basis of its own militia and in due course a more worthy bishop to oversee affairs, an appointment Gelderland is well placed to engineer. Gelderland showed itself to other nations to be a trustworthy ally. We curtailed the activities of a hostile power in the shape of Baldwin and in fact the Nabstrians surely scored an own goal by removing him for us thus saving The Emperor the embarrassment of a wrangle with the Church! Our troops behaved in line with the usages of war, no murdering, looting or pillaging etc. in contrast with the behaviour of the enemy who happily murdered civilians, even in a cathedral, thus surely drawing the condemnation of ecclesiastical authorities of every creed and the disgust of civilised nations generally. In terms of the wider political state of affairs I would humbly suggest that the Nabstrians have squandered valuable political capital in Mittelheim and made themselves look like pillaging brutish bullies for the gain of a couple of wagons of wine, some tin plates and brass spoons".

6 comments:

  1. Hmmm, strong words indeed,and we've still to hear from the Milkmaids and Associated Dairy Workers Union.
    This could turn out to be fightin talk.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They might account the outcome to be a great success. Whilst the milkmaid didn't make it out alive, the fact that she had the capabilities to kill or disable multiple enemy guards would no doubt make it more likely that folk would treat Guild members with respect, and also pay them on time.

      Delete
  2. Never let the facts get in the way of a good definition.
    More importantly will a monument be raised to an all to well known milkmaid?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Alas Douglas, being Special Forces, she cannot be identified! So the statue would have to be a plinth with nothing on it.

      Delete
  3. An anatomically accurate but tasteful statue maybe which would no doubt become an attraction to well disciplined Nabstrian tourists carrying suspiciously long holdalls? The potential revenue in tat could be enormous

    ReplyDelete
  4. The flaw in your plan, Deke, is your use of the word ‘tasteful’, which along with other words such as ‘culture’, ‘charity’, and ‘no, no - I think it’s my turn to buy the drinks’ are rarely, if ever, associated with Mittelheim.

    ReplyDelete