A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Cathedral, the Seventh!

Rushing past the two friars, Karlotte reaches the bishop! Baldwin's two guards immediately stand forwards and block her route.

'What's this?' says the Gelderland captain. 'Who are you? And don't give me the "I'm just a milkmaid on the lookout for any cows" routine: I wasn't born yesterday!'

'Although the major was', says the musketeer next to him.

'True', says the captain, 'given that our inhaber commissioned his new-born son as an officer in our regiment. But I digress! State your business Frau!'

'I'm just a milkmaid on the lookout for some cows?'

Seeing the officer drawing his sword, Karlotte realises that the game is up! Seeking the advantage, she strikes, but misses! The captain and musketeer strike back! They hit! With a cry, Karlotte falls to the ground. Upon this, Ziegler realises that desperate measures are required. He leads corporal Schultz forwards in an assault!

'Enemy jager! Come, no doubt, to release the bishop!' cries the captain. 'But you will have to fight your way through me first, you rascals!'

'You've killed our milkmaid!' cries Ziegler in shocked reply. 'Scoundrel! Cad! Poltroon!'

The captain looks down. 

'Well, yes, yes', he says reluctantly. 'Not a heroic act, perhaps, but I was left with no choice!'

Schultz kneels beside Karlotte. 'The maid still breathes, sir! She is not yet dead! She seems to be trying to speak!'

Karlotte coughes. 'I have seen ... things ... you people wouldn't ... believe! Catnip on fire on the shoulder of a lion! I saw sea breams ... glitter in the dark near the Brandenburg gate! All these moments will be ... lost in time ... Like beers in the rain. Time .. to die!'

'What was that?' says Ziegler.

'Time ... to die!' croaks Karlotta.

'No', says the colonel. 'The other stuff. In fact, mainly everything after the word "believe"'. 

'Alas, she's gone, sir', says Schultz, sadly. He begins to play a melancholy tune on his horn.

'Stop that, corporal', says Ziegler sharply. He then addresses the Gelderland captain. 'How could you have killed this poor innocent maiden? What officer, what gentleman, would do such a thing?'

The captain looks sheepish. 'She came at us! With her milk pail ... swinging it really vigorously'. He slumps. 'Look, I know that doesn't sound very dangerous, but believe me, if you'd seen it, swirling around, and the maid with that look on her face, you'd have shot and stabbed her repeatedly too. Any gentleman of substance would have done the same!'
'By no means!' shouts Ziegler. 'Defend yourself!'

Ziegler and Schultz lunge forwards and a desperate fight breaks out!

'I'll just wait here, shall I?' says Bishop Baldwin

Schultz's horn makes short work of the enemy captain! But Ziegler and his adversary simultaneously stab one another! They both keel over!

'Sir, sir!' cries Schultz.

'It's fine, corporal', says Ziegler, supine. 'The enemy bayonet thrust has miraculously been turned by the lucky schilling coin that I had in my breast pocket!'

'The coin that you gave to me yesterday, sir, if I stopped playing my horn?'

'Yes, the ... oh dear'.